


Teenager In Love

by Micah_Mell



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: F/F, F/M, How Do I Tag, M/M, Not Beta Read, Oblivious Michael Mell, Oblivious Rich Goranski, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Rich Goranski, Pining Rich Goranski, Rich Goranski-centric, Rich has an arm cast, Rich is in loveeee, rich has feelings, thats dangerous
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-09-18 20:44:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20319244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Micah_Mell/pseuds/Micah_Mell
Summary: I think over how I’ve been feeling the entire day.What does all of it have in common?It’s only when I’m around Michael Mell.—Rich realizes he has some strong feelings for a certain hoodied boy





	1. Suddenly Feeling

Rich’s POV****

As I walk into the school, I shuffle on my feet in front of the doors.

I just got out of the hospital, later than everybody else after the, uh, SQUIPcident.

Though, everybody had been checking up on me and lately they told me where to meet them once I got out of the hospital.

They said in front of Jeremy’s locker, and they told me which number it was. As I reach the locker, Brooke, Chloe, and Jake are already there. “Hey, guys” I say, lisp showing through.

“Hey, Rich!” Brooke grins. “How are you, man?” Jake asks, clapping me on the back.

“I’m fine” I say, messing with the cast on my arm, looking at the burns covering my other arm. 

“You know, those scars suit you” Chloe chimes in. Brooke stares at her. “That’s a little insensitive, Chloe..” Chloe looks embarrassed.

“No, no. I take it as a compliment..” I smile sheepishly.

They definitely notice that I’m acting differently..

But I think you would too if you just got out of the ICU of Beth Israel for burn treatment.

“I know, I’m acting weird, but I’ll be back to normal soon” I tell them. They all nod sympathetically. 

They’re also treating me differently too.

I mean, I understand, I’m suddenly acting like a whole different person. But that different person is myself from before the SQUIP came into my life. 

When I was more reserved.

And alone.

Just as I get lost in my thoughts, somebody else arrives behind me. “Hey you guys- oh! Hey Rich!” I hear them say. 

Sounds familiar. I turn around.

Michael Mell.

I managed to learn his name from the various visits from everybody, who all informed me of his name. 

Now I don’t have to just call him Headphones.

“Oh, hey Michael” I greet back.

“How are you doing? You know, uh, with the scars” He asks, leaning against the lockers. I notice the others have melted into their own conversations.

I look back at Michael. He fidgets with the lock on the locker. “Oh, you know, it’s just, different” I respond, finally focusing.

He nods patiently. 

“Well, I’m glad you’re fine, Rich” he says.

I smile in response, just as Jeremy approaches. “Oh, Rich!” He says, smiling. “I’m glad you finally got out of the hospital!”

“Thanks, Jeremy” I say, smiling at him too.

Michael’s attention turns to his friend and I turn away, not wanting to press myself into the conversation.

The bell rings, loud in my ears.

I definitely did not miss that.

Everyone starts to walk away, then Michael turns his head. “Bye, Rich! See you in 4th period!” He grins, turning back around. I wave back belatedly, blushing. 

Wait, what? Why is my face flushed?

That’s unusual. 

I’m sure it’s nothing though.

......

God, why is today dragging on so long? It’s only 4th period, damn it!

I tiredly drag myself into the classroom and into my seat as people file in behind me. 

I spot a familiar outfit. Red hoodie with patches. Oh yeah, he said he’d see me this period, right?

He looks my way. I wave sheepishly, face flushing again. I’m probably just embarrassed that he caught me staring.

I mean, I was only staring because I was identifying him. 

For sure. 

He smiles and waves back. My chest starts to feel like it’s tingling.

Suddenly, the teacher comes up the the board and starts to drone about getting into our seats.

Maybe that’ll distract me from whatever the hell is happening with me.

......

Finally, 4th period is over and I get up from my seat. As I gather my things, I see someone step in front of me. I look up, holding my backpack.

“Michael!” I jump. He smiles sheepishly. “Hi. Im sorry for scaring you,” he says. “But, um, maybe we could walk to lunch together? Since we’re here”

“Ah, yeah! Sounds good” I respond. He smiles happily. Somehow I can’t help but smile back.

As we walk out of the class, our footsteps fall in sync. “So, you doing good?” He asks, referring to my cast, I think. I look down at my cast. “Oh! It’s fine, just.. a little itchy” I say. 

He giggles. “Yeah, I’d figure”

My face flushes. Again. What the hell? I look at him for a moment. He looks at me back. We make silent eye contact for a minute before anyone says anything.

“So, uh, how are you doing in your classes?” He asks, face flushed like mine. “They’re going good so far, but I have a shit ton of work” I reply, smirking. He smiles sheepishly.

Then we reach the cafeteria. I open the door for him by instinct. He smiles softly and walks into the room.

We sit down at our designated ‘popular’ table, alone. “We’re early..” I say. He nods. “Seems like it, huh?” He asks, laughing.

Wow. I just realized that his laugh is really.. My train of thought gets derailed as Brooke and Chloe come to the table.

What was I thinking again?

“Hey, guys” I greet them coolly. Michael waves back at them. “Hey, you two!” Brooke smiles.

After she says that, the other members of our squad come up to the table one by one, filling it up.

Christine and Jeremy sitting together next to Michael, and myself on the other side of him.

He looks at me for a moment, then looks away immediately.

Huh.

I take out my food and start eating. As I eat, I think over how I’ve been feeling the entire day.

What does all of it have in common? 

It’s only when I’m around Michael Mell.

But, I don’t like him like that. At least, I didn’t think so. At the hospital, I was joking when I asked if he was single. I mean, I thought so, but now I’m starting to think otherwise. 

I hear someone calling my name suddenly. “Rich!” They say, tapping on the table. It’s Chloe. “Huh? What?” I ask.

I hear snickering around me at our table. “You were in some deep thought there,” Brooke says. “What were you thinking about?” 

I stay silent, face beginning to flush again. Damn, that’s happening a lot.

“Really, it’s nothing, just..” I take a bite of my food. “..thinking” 

Chloe nods. “Right,” She says. “Anyways..” she immediately falls back into her conversation, and I tune it out.

I feel a little weird. I mean, I just figured out that I have feelings for somebody that I used to make fun of and tease not too long ago. I wince in my head. 

God, when I think about it, that’s pretty bad.

But he seems to not be bothered at all.

In fact, he seems more comfortable than I thought he might be.

Also, at the same time, he seems awkward and nervous, which is what I expected from him.

“Okay, Rich, you really have to work on your spacing out” I hear Jenna tell me, snickering. “Whatever, at least I think hard about things” I tease, falling back into routine. 

“And there’s the Rich we know” Jake chimes in. I see Michael smile distantly.

Other than that, I see Christine and Jeremy talking amongst themselves. They’re pretty cute together, honestly.

They fit together well.

I look down at Jeremy and Michael’s backpacks. Boyf Riends. I laugh in spite of myself in my mind. I was an asshole.

Why would Michael tolerate me? He’s the only person who hasn’t been treating me like I was a child today... 

I hear the shrill sound of the school bell sound and I jump.

Woah, I guess time flies when you’re regretting your life choices. 

And how you’ve treated your current crush the past couple years

All my friends get up from the table and I follow suit after a moment or two. 

“See you!” Michael says to me, walking out of the cafeteria. 

I wave back, even though he already walked out. I feel my face start to burn.

Perfect.. 

......

Again, this sucks.

I swear, this day has been going on for ages.

But finally, the day has come to an end and I couldn’t be happier.

Today has been.. hectic, to say the least. First, I have to have a cast on my arm, and then I have feelings for Michael Mell. 

Which isn’t inherently a bad thing, but it’s just.. unexpected. 

I haven’t had felt like this since freshman year.

I push open the doors of the school, and I make my way towards Jake’s car.

I can’t drive myself due to my disabled arm, and he offered to drive me home so I wouldn’t have to take the bus again.

As I’m approaching his car, I notice Michael’s a few spots away from Jake’s.

He turns suddenly, looking at me. How does he always see me?

He waves goodbye to me and I return the favor.

I can feel my face flush.

......

I’m so screwed.


	2. Is This Love

I lay awake in my bed, checking the time.

10:00 pm.

Great.

I groan. I haven’t been able to keep my mind off of Michael for hours since my realization.

I don’t remember it being like this when I liked someone before.

I bite my lip, turning onto my other side, my thoughts filled with Michael Mell.

I start to fall asleep on that note, finally.

......

I wake up with a start, sitting up straight.

Another SQUIP nightmare.

In the hospital, they happened a lot. The nurses always had to come in to see what was happening.

I check the time on my phone.

3:00 am.

I sigh, pulling my knees to my chest. I can’t shake the lonely feeling that washes over me as I sit alone on my bed, with just my quiet thoughts.

At this point, I would love to have somebody here with me.

I deliberately begin to think about Michael, thinking what it would be like if he were here with me now, sitting next to me.

I feel my breathing calm.

When did it even quicken anyway?

My mind wanders, and I start to think of what it would be like if he were to lay next to me, his arms around me.

My face flushes, but it is helping me nonetheless. I continue to explore my thoughts as I lay back down comfortably.

Holding his hand.

His smile directed at me every single day.

His lips on mine.

I fall back asleep on that thought, and I am able to tell that that will be what I dream about all night.

......

My alarm rings, loud in my ears.

I wince, opening my eyes hesitantly.

Time for school again.

I push off the covers and get myself ready for school.

I look in the mirror, at how I look. I recoil. I’m not looking too great right now.

I push my hair back into an attractive position, and I pull on a camo jacket that I found in my closet.

I look back into the mirror. I hum. “At least I look better” I mumble to myself, rubbing my eyes.

I head down the stairs, grab my backpack, and head out the door in one slick motion.

I text Jake that I’m outside my house and ready for him to drive me.

I sigh and mess with my jacket sleeve, waiting for my friend to arrive. As I wait, I attempt to recall what I dreamt about after I fell asleep for the second time.

I remember something to do with the same boy who’s been invading my thoughts.

..And a lot of kissing.

Well, I guess that’s better than SQUIPmares.

......

Jake pulls up at the school, myself in the passenger seat. “Thanks for driving me again, Jake” I say, stretching.

“Hey, it’s no problem, dude” he replies. I nod, opening up the car door and stepping out.

I shut the door gently, as I’m using my injured arm. I look up at the school, feeling the nerves rise.

Seeing Michael again seems really intimidating, and I don’t know why.

Oh wait.

I have a major crush on him. Even more of a crush than I thought.

The steps I take towards our same meeting spot leave me feeling breathless.

I haven’t felt like this in so long. When Jake and I arrive at our destination, Brooke, Chloe, and Jenna are there, gossiping as usual.

I clear my throat. “Hey” They turn around, their conversation dissipating. “Oh! Hey!” Brooke responds, smiling nicely.

Jake leaves my side in favor of standing next to his girlfriend. Speaking of her, she is staring me down.

“Uh, what?” I ask Chloe.

“Oh, nothing, you’re just wearing something different” she notices.

I look down at my clothes. The jacket. “Oh, yeah, well I thought I would change things up a bit” I reply, sheepish.

“Oh, it looks great!” Brooke says, holding Jenna’s hand.

God. Is everybody dating someone except for me?

Well, Michael isn’t, I guess..

Suddenly, I hear steps behind me. I jump.

Michael slides next to me, smiling sheepishly. “Did I scare you again? Sorry” He says.

“It’s, um, fine” I respond, blinking a few times. He nods firmly, shifting on his feet.

I see Chloe looking at me from the side, and I know that means she’s trying to read how I’m feeling.

I can tell this is going to be a long day.

I decide to shut out anything but the sound of the school bell. It’s just better that way.

......

Man, 4th period gives me more stress than it ever did before.

I have to prepare myself to be distracted the entire time by the boy three seats from me.

It doesn’t exactly help when he smiles at me when he notices me looking his direction.

I’m not complaining though.

Nonetheless, it’s finally lunch, and I can put the first half of the day behind me.

Michael and I didn’t leave with each other, though. So I’m just sitting alone at the lunch table, waiting for at least one person to come to my rescue.

Somebody taps on the table. I can hear the nails hit the smooth surface. It’s Chloe.

“Oh, Chloe, where’s Jake?” I ask. “Getting a lunch” She drawls, sitting across from me.

“Rich, I’m gonna set this straight right now,” She starts. I tilt my head, confused. “You have a crush on somebody”

My face burns. “What? What makes you say that?” I ask, feigning ignorance.

“Oh, please, you’re lost in thought, you’re always blushing,” She lists.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I cut her list off.

She scoffs. “Whatever” We sit in awkward silence as our friends all come and sit.

Including Michael, but he was last, along with Jeremy. Christine came in alone. Huh.

I take the initiative. “Hey, guys” I wave at Jeremy and Michael hesitantly. “Hey Rich” Jeremy says back.

Michael waves back in favor of using words.

I mean, I’ll count that as a win.

Chloe keeps staring at me across the table though.

That’s.. uncomfortable. I squirm in my spot purposefully.

She stops staring after that.

Haha.

But sadly, as far the rest of lunch goes, no conversation has struck with me. Michael looked my way a few times.

So did Jeremy.

And Christine.

I ignore it, waiting out the rest of lunch, not touching my food. I tap my fingers on the surface of the table, impatient.

......

Throughout the rest of the day, I couldn’t keep my mind off of Michael again.

Is this going to be a regular thing?

I groan and put my hand across my face. “Why is this happening to me?” I ask myself.

It calms me down to think of him, yet it also makes me anxious.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d say this was love.

But that can’t be it. It’s just a small crush.

For sure.


	3. Doesn’t This Have a Name?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, me? Actually updating my fic?
> 
> That’s crazy

It’s been a few hours since the end of school and since I had my revelation.

I have feelings for one Michael Mell.

It kind of, well, hit me hard, so I haven’t been able to do much since Jake dropped me off at my home.

And if I’ve been thinking about his smile, his laugh, his eyes... then that’s nobody’s business but mine.

I push my fingers through my hair and lean back into my chair. Why is this making me feel so..

I grunt, pushing myself off the seat and laying on my bed.

I really need some rest. I close my eyes and wait for dreams to overtake my mind.

.......

I feel my body toss and turn as I dream, half-conscious.

“You.. like me?” Dream-Michael asks.

Dream-me nods without word, looking down at the ground. 

After several moments of silence, the room goes cold.

I look up to see an unnerving look of conflict and hesitance in Dream-Michael’s brown eyes.

“Rich.. I can’t-“ His eyes pierce into my soul. “You were a dick to me for so long! How could I ever trust you?”

Dream-me freezes, looking at Michael with watery green eyes.

I feel my body shift aggressively in my bed, going in and out of the dreamscape.

“Michael.. I’m-“ Dream-Michael shoots a cold look at me, making my Dream-self shut up.

“Don’t.” He says. “I don’t want to hear how sorry you are, or how you’ve changed.”

Dream-me starts to feel his face become wet at a quick paceZ 

“It doesn’t matter now. I’ve been hurt so many times in my life, I just can’t deal with this right now!” Dream-Michael cries, not minding my dream-self’s reaction. 

“Please, just, leave me alone!”

As he turns and walks away, Dream-me reaches out, tears covering more surface on my face the more steps he takes away from myself.

.......

I finally fully escape from the dreamscape and I gasp. I touch my fingers gently to my face, feeling a heavy amount of tears.

I wince and take a shaky breath, checking the time.

**5:00 A.M.**

I blink, not moving when my phone screen becomes dark once again.

That dream hurt almost as much as some SQUIPmares that I’ve had before.

Why did it hurt so much? The idea of being flat-out rejected by Michael like that..

The unbridled angst in his words. In his eyes. Everything about how he presented himself.

Maybe I was wrong.

This feels a lot like love.

It feels more real than anything else I’ve felt.

I lie alone on my bed, in the deafening silence and deep dark, attempting to will my negative thoughts away for the rest of the morning until I have to get ready for school.

......

My eyes shoot open as my alarm rings through my room. I only got about half an hour of sleep after the dream (or rather, nightmare) I had.

I get up from my bed and pace myself towards the bathroom. I stare at myself in the mirror. 

God, I look like shit.

I rub my hand across my face, groaning.

Great.

I go through my regular routine, eating, brushing my teeth, getting dressed, and waiting outside my door for Jake.

I place my face into my hands, contemplating my feelings until he shows up.

...... 

As Jake and I step into the school, I feel my heart begin to pick up the pace.

I take a deep breath quietly and lean up against the lockers, tuning out the conversations that my friends are having with each other. 

I close my eyes gently, feeling tired out of my mind. “Uh, Rich?” I jump at the sudden words. 

“Fuck!” I gasp, turning to spot the source of the voice. I can feel my eyes dilate as I register the figure in front of me.

“Michael! Oh god, I’m sorry!” My lisp comes through more than usual.

A patient and amused forms on his lips, making my heart pace even faster.

God damn it.

“Ha, it’s fine, Rich. I’m sorry for scaring you.. again” He says, fixing his glasses. “Are you okay, though? I don’t mean to be offensive, but you look like ass”

“I’m perfect. Amazing.” Michael blinks, and I sigh. “..I didn’t get much sleep, but I’m fine.” I say, stretching my arms.

Michael bites his lip. “Oh. Um, well, I hope you feel better” He says, concerned and caring.

I grin, my body working against my will. “Thank you” I reply. I meet his eyes, soft and sweet.

God. This boy is making me feel emotions that I haven’t felt... probably ever. 

If I have, it’s never been this strong.

After what seems like years of us making pure eye contact, the bell rings for first period. 

Jesus, this is going to be a long day, isn’t it?


End file.
